The procedure

This is not how I wanted this pregnancy to end.  The emotions are so difficult to work through, and the only thing that is giving some sort of peace is prayer.

John Chris and I spent the day at Baylor for the D and C procedure.  The staff, nurses, and doctors were very sweet and accommodating.  I held it together pretty well until the Chaplain came by right before I went to the operating room.  We chatted about the feelings that we are dealing with, and we were able to pray together.  She left a small stuffed lamb and some other items to comfort and assist with our grieving. 

The procedure was physically painless, and I am expected to recover within a week. I will take it easy and give myself the time.  I am looking forward to being back to "normal" physically.  I am sure the emotions will follow, but I am a short fuse of tears or anger these days. 

Sad news

The follow up sonogram did not go well.  The baby had not grown, and our precious baby's heart had stopped.  John Chris and I are filled with sadness and lots of questions.  It is really hard to stop thinking about how things could have been.  We were really excited and looking forward to the third pregnancy and welcoming another child into our lives.  The dreams had already started.